You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
I have enough bourbon in me to put Justin's cat in the dishwasher.
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
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