sorry about calling you the devil all night.
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
So... Sorry we took your wife to the strip club last night... And sorry we bought her that lap dance... I think you're getting closer to your dream of a threesome, though.
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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