idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
Randomize
