can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
Randomize
