Just gargled Fireball to get the fish taco taste out of my mouth. Almost as good as gum.
Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
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