Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
My one night stand asked me out to dinner. When he came to pick me up I got in the back seat. I thought he sent an uber. Awkward.
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Randomize
