dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
it's like heaven, but drunker
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
Randomize
