Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
Why is there broken glass in my purse?
You stole a snow globe. From your VP. Soooo...maybe don't put all your hopes on that promotion you were expecting
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
I need to wash the frat house off of me
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
Randomize