You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
My mom just drunkenly told me i was conceived in the back of a car, at a Bon Jovi concert.
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Randomize
