Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
Randomize
