Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
being pregnant is like rehab
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
The free coupon that printed out with the purchase of my plan b emergency contraception was for allergy meds. I feel like a coupon for condoms would've been more fitting in this situation.
Oh wait. It's for wart remover. Fitting, afterall.
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Randomize
