I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
Randomize
