If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
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