so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
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