Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
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