my "about me" section on Facebook should read "hell-bound alcoholic who wants to fuck a 40-year-old crackhead"
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
Randomize