PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
Randomize
