everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.
im still drunk. birthday week begins.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
Randomize