i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
Banjos are just sex machines. Like lights to moths, banjos are to hipster bitches.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
Randomize
