Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
i can't believe you bought a jetta. you know that's a girl car, right? if i hadn't had sex with you, i'd have no other proof you're straight.
I was talking to this girl who was in love with the air force. I was doing decently until I mentioned that the navy actually has more planes. Cockblocked by my knowledge of random trivia again.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
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