talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
Randomize
