Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats?
Well guess who isn't a virgin anymore
guess who isnt wearing pants has a shaving cream beard and is afraid theres no cream cheese in the fridge
the answer to that last one was me. the answer to the first one is you, you sly dog
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