you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
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