Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
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