That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
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