is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
Randomize
