Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
