Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
I just stood up and am wasted. I think I just admitted to my mom that I am trying to fuck everyone in New York because they're skinny and ethnically ambiguous. Meanwhile, happy hour isn't over yet.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
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