Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
Randomize
