yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
Randomize
