I am puke
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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