i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
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