But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
I just convinced a telemarketer I live in a tree.
What did he say?
He still asked if I want a home security system.
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
