he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
Randomize
