When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
The housekeeper found my huge dildo under the bathroom sink, and another in the living room. I can't get much more single than this.
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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