whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
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