I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
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