So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
and she was petting her beer can
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
I woke up to them arguing over who would get my morning wood. Oh, and I was dressed as Santa.
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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