That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
Randomize