Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
He ripped off my pantyhose and all I could think was, "oh no those were clinic-appropriate!" That's what I get for ditching a continuing education meeting to go hook up with my scuba instructor.
She needs sedatives and a leash
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
Randomize
