To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
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