ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
