My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
They let me keep the giant cocktail glass because I threw up in it. And made out with the bartender. Europeans are so generous. I'm getting it engraved
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
Randomize
