even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
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