I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
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