now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
Randomize