i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
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