I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
Randomize
