That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
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