I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
Dude, we're at Einstein's Bagels and the dude next to us is spreading cannabutter on his bagel.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
You need Xanax blowdarts
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
Randomize
