Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
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