You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
Randomize